Breakup can make it hard to focus on your work. Practice these six strategies to survive the initial few days at work and accomplish your work goals.

Breakups are like Tsunami – they engulf your happiness while leaving you in the debris of hope, grief, sadness and pain. Infact, they can disrupt nearly every area of your life. You don’t feel like stepping out, you can’t stop thinking about your ex, and, most of all, you find it incredibly difficult to show up or be productive at work. So, if you’re having trouble staying focused during a breakup period, here are some ways to steer clear the rough phase.

“Technically called as the ‘adjustment disorder’, end of a relationship is a kind of grief period,” says Dr Debanjan Banerjee, Psychiatrist NIMHANS, Bangalore. “It feels a lot like losing a loved one, because, factually, you do lose a loved one,” he says.

While breakups don’t come with any manual, magic trick or healing balm to get over your ex, the only thing you can count on is your mental strength. Initial months can be really crucial as you could be vulnerable and hurt. “First 15-30 days can get overtly stressful. It can even destroy or disrupt your work-life balance,” adds Dr Banerjee.

It is the phase when people tend to fall prey to self-destructive behaviour like indulging in drugs or any kind of intoxication, or drink-dialling your ex, etc. “Losing a partner sometimes seem to increase the risk of developing or triggering depression. It’s commonly seen when married couples get separated because divorces can even get complicated at times. Moreover, they are not just limited to emotional trauma but are often accompanied with the mental and legal pressures as well,” says Dr Banerjee.

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If you’ve just split with your significant other, here are 6 coping strategies on how to survive first 15 days at work:

1. Prioritise yourself and your needs:

End of a romantic relationship is rough but it’s not an excuse good enough to escape from your work. Following a failed relationship, people often stop eating or socialising, they don’t groom, can’t sleep, etc. That’s normal but stop being so hard on yourself. Treat yourself with compassion and understanding. Try and act normal. And the first step in doing so is by showing up at your workplace.

2. Vent your feelings:

Breakup can get emotionally taxing. But venting out your feelings is important to get the closure. If you are not comfortable to discuss it verbally, write it down and get over it. Don’t allow pain to build inside you. Listen to some sad songs or watch a tearjerker movie, if that gives you some kind of release. At work, you can reach out to your subordinate or your team lead for help. This way you can take it easy without letting your performance being affected. “Acceptance is crucial at this stage. So, give yourself some time to get over it. Avoid overdoing or overworking because it will only leave you burned out,” cautions Dr Banerjee.

3. Be socially active:

Being social doesn’t mean you have to be active on Facebook or Instagram. Go out with your work acquaintances or people you like spending time with. This will help you to shift your focus from your ex. Be natural and don’t lose hope.

4. Practice self-care techniques:

Breakup sucks! But it also gives you an opportunity to go back to life. Do things you always wanted to but could not for some reason. “Separation is a loss of human bond so a lot of self-consciousness happens. I know it’s easier said than done but try and normalise the loss,” suggests Dr Banerjee.

5. Change of workplace:

Running away from the situation is definitely not the solution unless you and your ex work at the same office/organisation. In that case, maybe, you can shift to another branch of your office or relocate to another city.

6. Seek professional help:

If you find it tough to battle it out all alone, seek professional help. “Unfortunately, seeking mental help is still considered to be a taboo in our country. People feel uncomfortable to reveal their identity and share their experiences,” says Dr Banerjee. “In such a scenario, we encourage people to seek help from some registered online forums.” Besides, you can share your pain with your school teacher, mentor, counsellor or someone you think can understand you better.